Live for today. Hope for tomorrow.

i miss my friends. and i need a new job. and i really need to get in shape. that about covers it for the next couple weeks til i write something else. i’m so bad about keeping up with this thing haha

i’m so lucky to have the life i have. there are days that i’d like to rip my hair out at the roots and light myself on fire…but then i have days like today where everything just seems right.

havent been on here in AGES!! dave is going to be a YEAR OLD in 18 days, and i can’t believe it! i have no clue what i’m going to do for his birthday. i know he wont remember it, but i still want to do something for it. david and i got back together — suupeerrrrr happy!! other notes — still working on trying to find a new job to gtfo of my house; and my grandmother thinks i’m a total lush.

i love my sweet boy!!

i tell people every day that i’m not a mind reader, but every day i expect YOU to be. i guess i feel like i shouldnt have to ask you for just a little help. i know that if rolls were reversed, you’d be aggrivated too.

i find myself incredibly jealous and resentful of other people’s happiness. does that make me a bad person?

james is choosing not to go through with the chemo. i cant imagine what his wife is going through. life has a way of just never making sense…

jiggity jog. so good to be home! david did SO well on both flights, didnt cry once, and slept almost the whole time each way. minneapolis was as beautiful as i remember it! total time crunch though haha. so stressful trying to fit in everything and everyone in just a few days, but it was totally worth it.

good news: grandparents are going on vacation very soon! yay! no offense to either of them, but geez.

bad news is very bad. my parents’ neighbor james was diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia about a year and a half ago. he was treated with chemothereapy and received a bone marrow transplant, putting the cancer into remission. we were all so relieved, and he did very well for so long; all of his tests came back mostly normal [his numbers came back low a couple times from viruses he caught. his immune system was pretty much shot with the chemo.] however, he got sick while i was in MN, and i just found out that he was transferred back to vanderbilt university medical center and his leaukemia came back. it’s not something that can be put back into remission…they’re going to try to treat it with another round of chemo, just to give him more time. they arent sure of the results. if he chooses not to do chemo, though, he has maybe three weeks. he’s all his wife has. they’re the nicest people i know, and they’re in the midst of making funeral arrangements just in case. please keep them in your prayers.

is the big day!! dave’s first flight! we’ll see how he does. and hopefully i’ll have a much clearer head when i get back in town. i think vacation is just what i need. and then a pool and something strong to drink, along with some great friends —YES that means YOUUU too alexiaaaa!!!!!